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Question

My name is C.,

I set myself on a journey of faith almost one year ago.

I’m trying to see God in everything I do during all day. I have a beautiful family composed of my three children and my wife who loves me very much.

I had an acute prostatitis which didn’t go away with several treatments, two years ago.

During this year I’ve been fighting with my wife to let her understand how our love is important as an “human act by which the partners mutually give themselves to each other”. I’ve been trying to convince my wife to make love on non-fruitful days, if we do not want other children but being ready to receive one if it happens.

Instead of what I said before, today the urologist prescribed me an antibiotic treatments with some clarifications. That is: to make protected love at least twice a week or masturbate often to ejaculate and ensure that the seminal fluid is often exchanged.

Because the disease is called “rebound”. That is: she infects me, I infect her.

And doing so, an incurable circuit is created.

I wonder if you could help me give an answer.

Thank you.

Answer

Dear C.,

1.I googled how to treat acute prostatitis and I also consulted doctors and nobody told me any similar indication to your urologist. Your doctor shows that he has a very low sense of the person, with the clarifications he has given you, because you cannot use your wife as a means to ejaculate. The marital intimacy must be a true act of love where you give yourselves to each other.

2. Furthermore, we must be convinced that the Lord never asks us to profane our own body or others to cure our health

“Protected love” is not a true act of giving yourself to each others.

Instead of the indications which your urologist gave you, you have to look for real alternatives in respect of yourself and others.

3. Finally, I would like to remind you that only what is good is also morally useful.

It’s also true the opposite: what is not morally good is ultimately not even useful, but it can be harmful.

4. I give you an example for all: the contraceptive pill is certainly immoral because it alters the meaning of sexuality and it distorts God’s sanctifying plan for human love and marriage.

Unless it is taken for reasons of force majeure as in the case of a therapeutic purpose, I challenge anyone to say that it is as useful to the body as drinking a glass of water.

5. I am not a doctor. But when I studied philosophy in Dominican schools we were taught that the transcendentals, which are properties inseparable from being; they are five (unum, aliquid, verum, bonum et pulcrum: one, other, true, good and beautiful) and they convert each others.

So, it’s true that what is good is also beautiful..

The same is for what is good which could be a useful good, a moral good or a delightful good.

Only what is good for a moral standpoint is also good for the standpoint of utility and well-being.

I wish you all the best, I remind you to the Lord and I bless you.

Father Angelo