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Question
Dear Father Angelo,
Yesterday, while listening to the Gospel at the Sunday mass, I felt disturbed by some words Jesus said. Here his words: “It was also said, Whoever divorces his wife must give her a bill of divorce.” But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. (Matthew 5:32)
Father, can a man ever be guilty of marrying a disowned woman?
I hope you will answer me. Meanwhile, I pray to the Lord for the important service that you offer to us, helping us to understand and know Jesus better.
Response from the priest
Dear reader,
1. Divorce does not cancel the marriage.
With marital consent, in fact, the two spouses expropriate themselves, from the deepest core, of themselves.
From that moment on, each of the two belongs indissolubly to the other, both in good and bad luck.
Even when a man divorces his wife, he does not become free. Instead, he remains hers.
And she, although repudiated, remains his.
2. This is the simple reason why marrying a divorced woman is the same as committing adultery.
Therefore when Jesus says: “But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” (Mt 5:32).
Here Jesus does not say anything new; instead, he reminds the Israelites of what marriage is.
3. Jesus underlines again the same concept later in Matthew:
Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” (Mt 19: 3).
Jesus replies:
“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Mt 19: 4-6).
4. In the Jerusalem Bible we read this lapidary annotation to the words “So that they are no longer two, but one flesh” (Mt 19,6): “Categorical affirmation of the indissolubility of the marital bond”.
5. Psuedo Chrysostom wrote: “It is not the act of marriage that constitutes the conjugal union, but the will; consequently it is not the separation of the body which destroys it, but the separation of the will.
It is for this reason that whoever repudiates his wife (…) remains his husband; since although separated in the body, they remain united in the will ”(Commentary on Matthew 19,9).
I wish you well, I remind you to the Lord, and I bless you.
Father Angelo