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Question
Dear Father Angelo,
I’m 35 and I’m a failure. It is not just a saying: I have never done anything good and fruitful in my life. I am unemployed, with insignificant work experience, I am still enrolled in university, but it’s like I’m not. Up to 4 years ago I had a girlfriend with whom I had a 10-year relationship, but my conditions did not allow the turning point of marriage and children, so we broke up. After her, other short and meaningless relationships. For some time I have been getting closer to religion, because in the emptiness of my life, in the loneliness and in the impossibility of having a decent relationship (my working and economic conditions lead women to have a certain preconception towards me), I found a foothold in faith so as not to sink completely. Sometimes I fear that my return to faith is a flash in the pan due to my condition, or maybe not. But I would like to continue in this way. I know the saying “God helps those who help themselves”, but I don’t see any opening; however I get a bit of enthusiasm if I think of becoming a priest, dedicating myself completely to God, helping others and restoring faith in others. I ask God to make me understand what my path is, because I don’t see any. What do you suggest me? I need to turn my life around. Pope John Paul II said to make a masterpiece of our life; mine so far has been just a scribble and a rather ugly one.
Thank you in advance for your reply.
Answer
Dear son,
Only today I can finally read the e-mail you sent me last July.
I apologize for being so late.
1. I believe that a serious resumption of the Christian life can help you in everything.
Recovery begins with Confession.
Pope Francis in his address to the German bishops on their usual ad limina visit (November 20, 2015) said:
” I would like to underline two points: Confession and the Eucharist. (…).
Confession is the place in which God’s forgiveness and mercy are received as a gift. It is in Confession that the transformation of every individual member of the faithful and the reform of the Church begin”.
2. For now, let’s forget about the reform of the Church.
The main problem for you right now is reforming your life.
You started your email with these words: “I’m 35 and a failure. It is not just a saying: I have never done anything good and fruitful in my life”.
3. I wonder: what do you need?
Here is the answer that immediately comes to the lips: you need a Savior.
This Savior is already there.
It is Jesus Christ.
4. Resume frequenting him with a serious and fruitful participation in the sacraments.
Starting from the Confession made on a regular and frequent basis with the same priest, so that he becomes in some way the father of your soul, the living image of Jesus, your Savior.
5. I have the impression that the words of Pope Francis were soon forgotten.
But they are among the most important and precious of his pontificate: “The transformation of every individual member of the faithful begins in Confession“.
In fact, it is not simply a rite, but an encounter between you and your Savior, through the mediation of the priest.
It is by its nature a saving encounter.
6. You will see that walking with Our Lord, with the light of his word and with the supernatural strength of his grace, everything will blossom again in your life.
Encounters with Jesus are encounters with the One who is “the resurrection and the life” (Jn 11:25).
Indeed, they are the encounters with the One who is your resurrection and your life.
From here everything will start.
This was also the case for Don Bosco.
I accompany you with my prayer with the hope that you too can say with David in the Psalm: “I am wonderfully made; wonderful are your works! My very self you know”(Ps 139, 14).
I wish you well and I bless you.
Father Angelo
Translated by Chiara P.