Dear Father Angelo,
I have been engaged to a girl for 9 months but my family doesn’t like it.
My name is Rosy and I have a complicated situation and I am not going to fight against either side because I love both sides.
Heavy quarrels happen every time, my parents offend her with heavy words and she gives out to me …
I try to reconcile the situation but I find myself screaming every day … I’m not going to leave her, but I don’t know what to do.
I would like to reassure my family of my love for them.
Answer from the priest
Dear Rosy,
1. you want to assure your parents of your affection.
But loving also means trying to make them happy.
Now how can this relationship make them happy?
2. The strong words that your parents use towards what you call your girlfriend express feelings that discern between what is true and what is not true, between what is good and what is not good, and what is clearly bad.
Those strong words are a sign of great suffering. Your words, however calm and sweet, can never transform a wrong reality into a right one.
3. It is true that today in Italy it is legal to forge paramarital unions between homosexual people to the point that in fact the people in question speak of their union as a marriage.
And consequently some speak of engagement between homosexuals. But the laws of a state can never become the truthful source of what is good and what is bad.
The truth about what is good and what is bad does not depend on the majority of citizens’ will, but on what is good or bad in itself.
If it depended on the will of the majority, it would mean being destined for the worst of despotisms. It took centuries and revolutions to break free from the absolutisms of kings. Why voluntarily fall into the abyss of other absolutisms?
4. What is good and evil in itself is manifested by the natural law and is also manifested by the biological meaning of sexuality which leads to marrying a person of the opposite sex.
Only in this way does sexuality express its authentic potential and its intrinsic purpose for the preservation of the human race.
Otherwise it annihilates the original reality for which it was created: the conservation of mankind.
5. For this reason in Sacred Scripture the sins of homosexuality are presented as sins that cry out to Heaven because of the serious disorder they bring.
It does not take long to understand that the exercise of sexuality between homosexuals is not according to the design of the Creator.
If one is a believer, he understands it straight away.
But even a non-believer understands that sexuality is not made for homosexuality.
6. I stop here because your email does not ask for advice for your conduct, but just for a word to convince your parents.
I just want to point out why your parents suffer.
It is a serious reason. They probably express their disappointment with inappropriate words. But their suffering is not unjustified.
I wish you well, I remind you to the Lord and I bless you.
Father Angelo
