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Dear Father Angelo,
It is a real pleasure for me to be able to send you this email.
It is the first time, and I decided to disturb you relying on your enormous and infinite availability that you always have in responding to all visitors to this website.
My name is Marcello and I am 42 years old.
I am not married or engaged at this time in my life.
Also, I’m not ashamed to say I’m a virgin.
Rather!
Even if I had a girlfriend, I would never have sexual intercourse before the Sacrament of Marriage.
I confess that I would very much like to form a family and have children but, unfortunately, the unemployment situation that afflicts me does not allow me to take this responsibility.
And then, to get married, it still needs a woman who, for the moment, I haven’t found in my life.
But this is not the topic I would like to discuss and I do not want to waste your time.
My concern is about masturbation. As I told you, I have never had sexual intercourse.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church is very clear with reference to this sin.
I also know well what is the difference between a mortal and a venial sin.
In the Catechism I read:
“By masturbation we must mean the voluntary arousal of the genital organs in order to derive a venereal pleasure”.
Many times, however, I find myself in a different situation.
Here is my doubt:
I don’t spend any time looking at pornography and trying to voluntarily arouse myself to masturbate and orgasm, but arousal pops up suddenly, once in a while, and I can’t get over it until spontaneous ejaculation occurs without masturbation and, in other cases, instead, with the collaboration of my hands.
I don’t even have impure thoughts and I have a splendid relationship with women based on education. Also, if I spend several days in that state, I start to have certain physical discomfort in the lower parts (I wouldn’t call them pains).
I feel the need, once in a while, to expel everything like any other person needs to go to the bathroom.
The question is the following:
My way of expelling excess “sexual material” (because that’s what it is, it seems to me) without voluntarily arousing myself (even though I have to use my hands many times), what kind of sin is it? Is it mortal or venial? Or is it not a sin at all?
An important Italian bishop (well known nationally), during a Confession, assured me that it is NOT a sin at all to expel that sexual material in that way.
I also tell you that I hardly ever have nocturnal pollutions.
I would like to have your opinion on this, Father Angelo, because, although I pray every day, confess every week or every 15 days and go to Mass every Sunday, I would like to take Holy Communion without running the risk of committing a sacrilege.
Heartfelt thanks Father for your answer. I ask you – please – let me receive it here in private first. Then, if you want, you can also publish it on the site.
I assure my prayers for you as for all priests who carry out their mission with so much delicacy, love and respect for people.
A big hug.
Marcello
A priest answers
Dear Marcello,
1. I start from some declarations of the Magisterium of the Church.
The Holy Office to the question: “Is masturbation directly procured with the aim of obtaining sperm to discover the contagious disease” blenorrhagia ” and, as far as possible, to cure it, legitimate?”, answered “no” (DS 3684).
2. Pius XII then said: “On the other hand, it is superfluous to observe that the active element can never be legitimately procured through an act against nature” (29.9.1949).
3. In 1956 the same Pontiff, in a speech delivered on May 19, 1956 on marital sterility and artificial insemination, recalled the prohibition for biologists to carry out analyzes on sperm collected through masturbation.
In a very detailed and precise way he said: “The fact of obtaining human sperm by masturbation directly aims at the full natural exercise of the human faculty to generate.
Now this full exercise, carried out outside the conjugal union, involves the direct and unduly usurped use of this same faculty.
The intrinsic violation of the moral rule is part of this improper use.
In fact, man has no right to exercise the sexual faculty for the very fact of having received this faculty from nature.
To man, in fact (unlike what happens for other animals devoid of reason), the right and the power to exercise this faculty are conferred only within a validly contracted marriage, and are included in the matrimonial right conferred and accepted with the marriage itself.
It therefore clearly follows that man, for the sole reason that he has received the sexual faculty from nature, has only the power and the right to marry.
However, this right, in its object and extent, is determined by the law of nature, not by the will of man.
By virtue of this natural law, man possesses the power and the right to the full exercise of the sexual faculty, directly sought, only in the fulfillment of the conjugal act according to the norm prescribed and defined by nature itself.
Apart from this natural act, the full use of this sexual faculty is not permissible even in marriage.
These are the limits within which nature circumscribes the right mentioned above and its exercise. Due to the fact that the full exercise of the sexual faculty is limited to the absolute limit of the conjugal act, this same faculty becomes intrinsically suitable for completely achieving the natural end of marriage (which is not only procreation, but also the education of children), and its exercise is linked to the end in question.
This being the case, masturbation is situated entirely outside the aforementioned natural capacity to fully exercise the sexual faculty, and therefore also outside its link with the end fixed by nature.
Therefore masturbation lacks any title of right and is contrary to the laws of nature and morality, even if it is intended to serve just and unreprehensible purposes.
All that has been said so far about the intrinsic malice of any full use of the power to generate outside the natural conjugal act applies equally whether it is a matter of persons joined in marriage or unmarried persons, and the full exercise of the the genital apparatus occurs on the part of the man or the woman, or both of them working by mutual agreement; whether this occurs through manual contacts or by interruption of the marital act.
In fact, it is always an act contrary to nature and intrinsically bad”.
4. Shortly before, always in the same speech he said: “But these same acts must be reproved even when serious reasons seem to exempt them from guilt, such as: the care given to those who suffer from excessive nervous tension or abnormal spasms; microscopic examination of sperm infected with bacteria of venereal or other origin; the analysis of the different ordinary components of the sperm aimed at discerning the presence of vital elements, their number, quantity, shape, vigor, appearance and other such elements”.
5. You have heard in this regard the sentence of an important bishop.
Nonetheless, you are not sure and you are not at peace.
This means that you warn yourself that there is something wrong.
6. I respect the sentence of that important bishop.
But, after having consulted the Magisterium and given the uncertainty that you feel, if I were you I would opt for the surest solution, that is, for sacramental confession.
This does not involve a particular burden to you because you already have the commendable initiative to confess on a regular and frequent basis.
7. Furthermore, sacramental confession would undoubtedly stimulate you to overcome the inevitable temptations, which in you would be neutralized by voluntary emptying.
With the excuse of expelling the surplus you would exempt yourself from the fight.
But without a fight there is no real virtue.
8. Here is my opinion that pushes you to take the safest path and stimulates you to be victorious in the fight.
9. I heartily thank you for the prayers you assure for me and for all priests.
I also thank you for the kindness with which you wrote to me and for your trust.
I gladly remind you to the Lord and I bless you.
Father Angelo