My name is Assunta, I am 26 years old. I have a question that has haunted me for a long time! We generally speak of God as Father through Jesus Christ. Through Him, we become children. God reveals himself through human’s being made in the image of God,, but how can I see God as a father, and how can I feel like a daughter, if I do not know humanly what it means? I come from a problematic family, absent parents who made me feel I was always alone in my life. I have always faced everything alone between tears and action. I therefore cannot see God as a father, since humanly I do not know what it means to have a father! I do not know what it means to be loved as a daughter should be, my father has always told me that I am a failure, a disappointment, that I am useless for myself and for the others, and many other bad things that I am not here to list. I grew up with a feeling of great insecurity and loneliness, always being alone! I still carry inside the wounds of those words, which echo in my head and do not allow me to see God as a father. Sometimes I think: why does God allow this to happen? Perhaps he does not love me, the way my father does not love me? So, who is God? I have bleeding wounds in my soul that are still open and they prevent me from understanding where God wants to lead me. Despite my faith being wavering, I still believe that somehow God is present, even if I do not understand how.
1. Sometimes we say that we do not see the fatherhood of God, but perhaps the reason is that a veil has spread over the eyes of our mind and prevents us from seeing.
Father is the one who makes us miss nothing.
Well, don’t you see the fatherhood of God in the sun that rises everyday for you?
Can’t you see it in the air you breathe, in the water, in the fire, in the earth, in the fruits, in the greenery, in all the terrestrial animals and in all the birds?
It is the Lord who has made all these creatures for you.
There is a risk of believing that it is our right to have all these things. Instead, those things are a gift, a sign of God’s tenderness for each of us.
2. You might say: but I do not have a father or a mother as I wish.
Well, listen to what Holy Scripture says: “ Even if my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will take me in”( Ps27,10).
If you open the Scriptures, especially the Gospels, there you will find the Lord speaking to you.
If you go to confession, there you will find the Lord who purifies you.
If you go to Mass, there you find the Lord who gives you nourishment for the spiritual life.
3. Saint Teresa of Avila writes at the beginning of her life: “I remember that, when my mother died, I was twelve years of age or a little less. When I began to realize what I had lost, I went in my distress to an image of OurLady and with many tears besought her to be a mother to me. Though I did this in my simplicity, I believe it was of some avail to me; for whenever I have commended myself to this Sovereign Virgin I have been conscious of her aid”.
4. If we too turned to Mary and entrusted ourselves to her!
She was given to us for Mother in every need.
If we could also say with Saint Teresa of Avila: “there was no thing in which I was recommended to this Sovereign Virgin without my being immediately granted”.
5. The same thing did Saint Therese of the child Jesus, the Saint of Lisieux, who lost her mother when she was four and a half years old.
In her autobiography, entitled The Story of a Soul, she writes “Sometimes, when my mind is in such a great aridity that it is impossible to draw forth one single thought to unite me with God, I very slowly recite an “Our Father” and then the angelic salutation [i.e. Hail Mary, t.n.]; then these prayers give me great delight; they nourish my soul much more than if I had recited them precipitately a hundred times. The Blessed Virgin shows me she is not displeased with me, for she never fails to protect me as soon as I invoke her. If some disturbance overtakes me, some embarrassment, I turn very quickly to her and as the most tender of Mothers she always takes care of my interests” (St. Teresa of Lisieux, The Story of a Soul, page 243).
6. Try to do it like Saint Therese of Lisieux: “If my spirit is in such a dryness that it is impossible for me to draw a thought to unite with the good Lord, I very slowly recite the “Our Father” and then the angelic greeting”.
You will immediately feel the divine paternity and the extraordinary motherhood of the Virgin Mary.
You will no longer say: I am abandoned. I am forgotten by the earth and also by Heaven.
You will immediately feel you are held in the hands of the Father as in a shell and you will feel the caresses of this Mother through so many cares for you, more than any mother on earth can do.
I wish you a beautiful month of May, which as you know is the month dedicated to the Virgin Mary.
Ask her to be your Mother by reciting the Holy Rosary every day.
You will see that she will come to you, and she will heal you in her own way, which is that of sweetness.
I wish you well, I remember you in prayer, and I bless you.
Translated by Emanuele Menchiari
Proof edited by Sara Bellei Kojchev