Take two people who love each other; once in the afterlife, one is in Heaven and the other in hell

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Question

Dear father Angelo,

Thank you so much for the answer you gave me about the heroic act.

It’s June and I’m still swinging between serenity and depression. I’ve been writing to you for a long time and I keep on doing it because I trust you greatly.

Father, you know that I’m starting to think that I’ll never get free from this scruple/temptation (I don’t know what to call it anymore!). There is one thing that keeps challenging my faith, you should know this by now. Lately, the attacks have begun from your answers; I admire you so much and It’s painful to see that my temptations also start from your answers. Father, let me tell you what happened:

I have scoured your entire site through the search engine (which is really accurate and fast, I must say) and I have found various questions about hell and  corresponding answers. There was this specific question (which was exactly what I wanted to know): “How can parents not suffer knowing that their son is in hell”; well, I read the answer carefully… and that’s when it started… once I reached this section: “Equally in Heaven, as they contemplate the punishment of the wicked, the saints will be filled with joy by considering their own deliverance in virtue of Christ’s blood” (cf. Summa Theologiae, Supplement, 94, 3). My temptation (to express it in vocal form) shouted: “I WAS RIGHT! Look… they rejoice as if to say ‘thank God we’re not like them’. Now tell me, Salvatore, how does all this sound to you? Take for example two people who love each other; once in the afterlife, one is in Heaven and the other in hell: the latter hates the former who rejoices for his deliverance, not even thinking about the other’s suffering. What happened to their mutual love?”. And that, father, shut me down. I didn’t know how to react to this temptation. My heart is broken, but does it tell the truth? Is it real that if two people end up in different places after death their love vanishes? I couldn’t withstand this thought, father. I hope you’ll enlighten me.

Answer

My dear,

1. In Heaven there will be a transformation. 

We will love as God loves, we will see everything as God does.

2.  We will see how much God has done to save everyone until their last moment. And we will also see the closure and stubbornness of those who didn’t want to the very end to be loved by God.

This is hell: the refusal to be loved by God and Heaven.

3.  God doesn’t send anyone to hell; on the contrary, He does whatever is possible to reach the heart of man until the very last moment, and with infinite love. However, freedom can be used badly. It can be used to keep God out of the door forever.

4.  The Catechism of the Catholic Church rightly says that hell is the “self-exclusion from communion with God and the blessed” (CCC 1033).

It also says that “To die in mortal sin without repenting and accepting God’s merciful love means remaining separated from him forever by our own free choice” (Ib.).

5.  Now, let’s get to your example: “Take two people who love each other; once in the afterlife, one is in Heaven and the other in hell: does the latter hate the former? And does the former rejoice for his deliverance, not even thinking about the other’s suffering? What happened to their mutual  love?”.

I tell you that it is not true that those in Heaven don’t even think about the souls in hell. It really is the opposite. However, those in Heaven see all things from another angle: the infinite and caring love of Jesus Christ for that person will be visible, and it will also be clear the stubbornness that stopped him from being loved by Christ and those with Him.

Therefore, in the afterlife it will be seen that one of the two separated voluntarily and doesn’t want to be loved by the other anymore. The soul in hell is obstinate on this and clearly says: I don’t want to know anything about you because you loved Jesus Christ and still love Him with all your heart.

6. I understand that our human way of expressing things isn’t perfect. However, this is the substance of it.

Regarding your final question “What happened to their mutual love?” I answer that one soul keeps loving, and actually loves wholeheartedly.

The other has ceased loving and doesn’t want to be loved anymore.

I’ll say it again: this is what hell is. It is ceasing to love and not wanting to be loved by anyone.

I hope I’ve enlightened you.

I wish you every good, bless you and assure you of remembrance to the Lord.

Father Angelo